I wish you had chosen to lecture the offender on the merits of good behavior instead. ____________ Mujahid sahib Fair enough. Prior to posting my very first comment, a thought did cross my mind that my opinion may be construed as a lecture and specially from some one as sharp as you are and one who is blessed with a strong sense of critique. I though did not had the intention to lecture anyone as I don’t have the right to do that. Barring very few instances and very very few respected folks contributing to this forum, I seldom attempt to lecture anyone. I did not had any intention to lecture respected نادان sahiba at all as I don’t have the right to do so. On my part, it was a very stable attempt to encourage her to return and contribute to various discussions. I thought a little encouragement to the one who, in my opinion, (which is most probably wrong) might have been hurt is a more positive approach than lecturing the alleged offender. As such it is very difficult for me to lecture the “offender” as you have described. If you are referring to respected GeoG sahib’s exchange with respected نادان sahiba, yes initially I did find his comments very insensitive to the point of being callous. While I still don’t like what he wrote, I also thought that perhaps respected GeoG sahib is trying to communicate that one should not pass any judgement or comment on anyone’s illness or death as we all face such situations ourselves and with our dear ones. When I started pondering from that perspective, I felt that respected GeoG sahib perhaps had a different intention but he chose wrong time, wrong words and wrong person to express that. I may still be wrong in my assessment. Regardless of what I felt or what I feel, I am still of the opinion, that I cannot lecture anyone (barring one or two respected members of this forum with whom I take unlimited liberties) nor I should lecture anyone. Adults sharing their opinion need to assess how they communicate and whether they should communicate anything hurtful. I also believe that if respected نادان sahiba is hurt because of that avoidable incident, she should still not leave this forum.